So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
