puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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