Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
