Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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