Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize