I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
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