she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
