You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
