I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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