"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
worst night to have a conscience
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
