I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
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