When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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