yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
