he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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