the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
