Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
