"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
