It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
