i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Randomize