I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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