Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
