so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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