Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
