It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize