one two three fourrrrnication!
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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