I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
