I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
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