Porn is love you can see.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
