if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
