i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Randomize
