what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
