how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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