nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Randomize
