is your mom at the bar?
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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