she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
My feet surprised me
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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