Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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