I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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