i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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