I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
