quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
We are two peas in an std pod
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
