needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
