doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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