So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
