So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
