It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
