i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
