I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
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