I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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