That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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