And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize